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Four Old Men and One Lady in Red


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By Kors - Posted on 16 October 2012

My take on the weekend….

You don’t stop doing things when you get old, you get old because you stop doing things. That was the philosophy behind this weekend away with some of NSCC’s finest, all on the wrong side of 40. This was to be the biggest one day ride most of us had ever attempted. The ‘Warnie’.

I’m not a big fan of this style of racing. A, B, C and D grade all start together. Similar to the Goulburn to Citi the race becomes a survival test for ‘club riders’. Covering 262km the Warnie is a test which lasts longer than any other in the country. How long can you hang on with A grade - full time riders who have been training and racing non stop for the past few months. It is a privilege and an experience to be able to race with some of the top domestic talent, and it amazes me how strong the skinny little runts are but it somewhat devalues the B grade ‘race’ unlike the Grafton where each grade starts separately and races separately. You know where you are in the field at Grafton and how many are in front.

In the Warnie there was a never ending washing machine effect in the peloton. You roll up to the front 30 or 40 bikes then 5 minutes later you are at the back again, grab another wheel and rotate to the front again and again and again knowing that when the heat gets turned up you need to be as near to the front as possible. It doesn’t always work.

I have no idea how far we had gone or how far we had to go but when we took a 90 degree left hander and I saw 5 Genesys riders lined up on the front followed by Budget Forklifts and Drapac I got the sense we were in for some entertainment. It didn’t take long for the peloton to get strung out in a straight line as the ever present wind turned into a cross/head and everyone was dribbling in the left hand gutter. The line up seemed to be 100 bikes long in front of me and there was no way I was going to get around anyone to advance my position. Then the bloke 4 wheels up pulls off to the right, there’s a 10m gap in no time and a scramble to get across. If I’m not in the red now its definitely a dark shade of amber. I’m back in the line but the next bloke in front pulls out again. This can’t go on for much longer!. Oh yes it can. The line is now disintegrating. There are now two dashed lines, the left line in the gutter still driving, still regretting being too far back in the pack and the right line, who’s souls have left them as they mutter rude words to themselves and prepare for a 100+ km ride back to the finish, their day is done. The gap in front of me then opens up to about 30m, the wind still playing mind games. A couple of hundred metres of driving in to the wind and I don’t seem to be making much progress so a flick of the elbow I pull to the right, crest fallen and ready to jump on the next blokes wheel. No one rolls through, I turn around and there’s a 20m gap behind me. I’m in no man’s land. I can see Kor about 100m up the road in a smaller group having himself been detached from the slowly disappearing peloton. Do I sit up and wait for reinforcements which may never come or get my head down and bridge. I eventually got back on to Kor’s group and was joined by some stronger riders from behind. Now the niggling started. A couple of A graders sitting in and getting a free ride demanding others take a turn always gets a less than pleasant response. We soon took a right turn and ‘thankfully’ into a head wind! Ahhh, shelter! Our little group worked well to get back onto the main peloton who thankfully had got bored of handing out punishment and were now spread out across the road.

After rolling through another unknown town we hit the climb of the day. A mere bump compared to the Gibraltar range but sufficiently long to sort the skinny runts from the rest. Acknowledging my B grade status and 80 something kilo’s I sat towards the back and was consigned to more dribbling up the two climbs and watching the main peloton and the race go up the road. 5 ‘B’ graders made it over with the peloton and would go on to take out the main B grade prizes for the day. The last 40kms settled down to a steady training ride when all the aches and exhaustion really started to tell. Good training for the Grafton I kept reminding myself.

After reminiscing the day’s events over a quality feed it became apparent I had a less painful day than some – especially Neil, who won’t be fearing his next visit to the proctologist having suffered sphincter knack from 100 odd km’s with an inappropriately positioned saddle. Barry also lost some skin in one of his many crashes and probably should have left a note for the cleaning maid to explain the blood on his bed sheets.

5:00 am Sunday morning.

‘I’ve never seen you looking so lovely as you did tonight’

Wtf?

‘I’ve never seen you shine so bright’

Chris De Burgh’s dulcet tones fill the apartment. He got through the first verse before Neil found the ‘off’ button. Apparently Neil accidently knocked his mobile phone and the song started playing!. We still don’t have a satisfactory explanation as to why ‘Lady in Red’ was on his mobile, how it came to play so easily and why it took a whole verse to kill it.

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beauie50's picture

Thanks for the wrap...well done all ! "Sphincter knack? Sounds nasty.

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